


The Fallen King

by TheNightFury



Series: Prince of Lasan [7]
Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: M/M, Prince of Lasan, SWR AU, royal au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-07
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2020-06-24 06:37:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19718215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNightFury/pseuds/TheNightFury
Summary: Just as life is starting to fall into place for Zeb, a Loth-Rat comes along to shake things up again.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am so sorry for the delay in posting this guys! Life got a little insane for me and this chapter was not an easy one to write if I'm honest. This chapter is a little short but the ending spot just really worked for me.

Ever since coming to Lothal, Alex hadn’t been in Zeb’s dreams as much which was a mixed blessing. On nights Alex appeared were the nights he dreamed of Lasan falling. But not dreaming of Lasan falling meant he didn’t see Alex, and as the days turned into years, Zeb started to fear he was forgetting what Alex looked like; what shade of blond was Alex’s hair? Was it dirty blond or strawberry? Where his eyes that bright and golden? How exactly did he keep his beautiful sideburns? 

In his dreams at least, none of those little details mattered, because in his dreams Alex was right there with him, and that was the important thing. Tonight though, Zeb wasn’t dreaming at all. All he could do was toss and turn restlessly, willing himself to fall asleep. With a frustrated sigh, Zeb rolled onto his back and let his mind wander to one of the last peaceful nights he had with Alex. 

_Alex breathlessly lay beneath him, hands tenderly stroking his naked body. Zeb carefully settled himself on top of Alex. For some reason Alex loved it when Zeb lay on top of him, particularly after sex when both were naked and he could be enveloped in Zeb’s fur. Zeb nuzzled his face in the crook of Alex’s neck, earning an arousing sigh from him._

_“Why do you like this so much?” Zeb softly asked as Alex continued to stoke his fur, body still trembling beneath him._

_“Your fur is so soft and warm,” Alex admitted breathlessly. “I feel…..safe like this.” The words made Zeb pull away slightly in concern._

_“You don’t normally feel safe?” He asked, tenderly stroking his cheek._

_“I do, I do,” Alex whispered, reaching up to cup his face in his hands, stroking his cheek with his thumbs. “Just….this is going to sound crazy but I feel safer with you right here with me….the Empire scares me and….I just like knowing with every fiber of my being you are right here with me safe.”_

_“Alex, listen to me,” Zeb firmly said. “The Empire cannot touch us here.”_

_“I know,” Alex softly said, tenderly pecking his lips._

How wrong he had be been. How had he been so foolish as to think the Empire would leave Lasan in peace? They hadn’t done anything to the Empire yet they decided to destroy Lasan without any guilt or remorse. Kanan and Hera where certain the same fate would befall Lothal without them. Well at least Fulcrum thought so. Kanan was certain there was something else calling them to Lothal. Something important here that they needed to find. He had no idea what it was they needed to find, only that it was close.

Whatever it was Kanan was sensing would unfortunately have to wait. Today they where ambushing an Imperial shipment loaded with supplies and weapons, they and the people of Tarkintown desperately needed. It was a fairly simple mission, Kanan would be the lookout for the supplies while the rest of the crew innocently loitered waiting for the signal to strike. Easy. Or it should have been. 

Just as they where snagging the cargo, a kid, a kid, jumped in and stole some! A kid completely ruined their simple mission. It was humiliating and enraging all at once. Kanan did get the supplies back, but it allowed the Empire to catch up to them, forcing them to flee to space to get away. 

After all the trouble he caused, this kid, Ezra, had the gall to start flirting with Sabine who was clearly not at all interested and the kid was not getting the message. Time for an intervention.

“My name’s Ezra-“ The kid was saying as Zeb reached out to lift the kid off of his feet and pull him over to Zeb who growled, 

“My name’s Zeb.” Ezra reeled back, gagging,

“Your breath stinks!”

“So you don’t like the air quality in here? How about you get your own room?” Zeb snapped, tossing him into a storage closet and locking it. Zeb almost forgot about him after that as Hera needed them all on the guns to deal with the tie fighters on their tail. In fact, Zeb didn’t even think about him again until over the comm Hera asked where the kid was. Zeb had expected to find the kid still in the storage closet, only to find it empty with the grate for the air vent on the ground. 

“He was here….”

“Oh he’s here alright,” Sabine said, looking up at the vents, he could practically hear the smirk that was on her face as she said those words. 

“I need you both on the turrets!” Hera snapped, both of them jumping into action, pushing any thoughts of the kid out of his mind to focus on getting his team out alive. Though with a pilot like Hera, that job was laughably easy. Once the tie’s were taken care off, Zeb went to try and find their surprise stowaway, which was far easier then Zeb thought because he was once again flirting with a completely uninterested Sabine. 

“Come on you,” Zeb said, roughly grabbing the kid and half dragging him to the cockpit where Hera, Kanan and Chopper where waiting for them. 

“Take me back to Lothal!” Ezra demanded, puffing out his chest in an attempt to look more intimidating then he was or ever could be. 

“Don’t worry we are,” Hera assured. 

“Wait right now?” Ezra cried; eyes wide in horror. “Won’t the Empire be looking for us?” The kids fear was almost amusing to Zeb, he clearly had no clue about the Ghosts capabilities, to be fair though, it was a good thing no one knew what this ship could do. Even he didn’t really even know everything the Ghost could do, and Hera liked it that way, it made it easier for them to go to places undetected, which was especially advantageous during rescue missions. Like Lasan. Zeb tried to show the thought away, but once the gate was opened there was no stopping it. 

All the what if’s and should have’s flashed through Zeb’s mind, drowning out any other thought. He shouldn’t have let Alex go get the council, he should have. Or what if they’d stuck together? He might be dead but at least he’d be with Alex. Or they would both be alive but at least they would be together where ever that was. Or what if they’d run away like Zeb had only slightly been joking about. Run away to another world to live out in peace not as royals but as two people. He would have given up the throne in a heartbeat for Alex. He would give up anything for him, his crown, his castle, his life. None of it mattered without Alex. 

Before his thoughts could spiral too far down into the dark abyss, Sabine was able to pull him back to the safety of the light. 

“Come on Zeb, we’re here,” She gently said before going over to one of the crates with food in it, the kid once again whining about how it was ‘his’ and they couldn’t have it. 

“We stole it first,” Was all Zeb would say on the matter before exiting the Ghost. Besides, these people needed it far more than he did. While Kanan and Hera went off to meet their contact, the three of them made their way to Tarkin Town with the crates of stolen food. They didn’t even have to call out to the people before they started eagerly gathering around them, hope that the crates contained the food they so desperately needed to survive. Seeing their eyes light up in joy when they opened the crates and started handing out food warmed him to his core. 

For a little while, he could almost imagine he was back on Lasan with Alex by his side handing out food to the people who so desperately needed it. It was one of the few royal tasks Alex truly enjoyed partaking in, he always saw it as a precious opportunity to connect and learn more about his people whilst helping them in their greatest hour of need. It was something Zeb admired and adored about him. He was always looking out for those who needed help. He’d always had a strong desire to bring justice and peace to those around him, and giving out food was one of the easiest ways for him to fulfil that desire. 

Zeb could feel his heart clenching at the memory of Alex, an ache spreading through him that threatened to drag him back down. Once again though, someone was able to pull him back into the light. A young Rodian kit, tentatively tugging at his clothes to get his attention, to short to reach into the crate and get some food for himself. With a soft smile Zeb grabbed some fruit and kneeled down in front of him to hand him something, the boy gratefully taking it and beaming up at him with a wide grin before racing off to his family. 

Even in his darkest moments of wondering why he was still alive or what even the point of living was, little things like this helped to remind him. People where suffering, and he had the power to help them. It might not be much, but it was something. He could keep living for these moments, seeing the tearful joy in the people’s eyes as he passed out food to them was a reminder that there was something worth living for still. Hope.

He could bring back hope to these people, hope that things could get better, hope that someday their children could grow up without fear. Hope that they would never suffer as his people did at the hands of the Empire. It wasn’t much, but it was something; And Ashla knew he needed to find something to hang on for, it’s what Alex would have wanted. Besides, the Empire had burned everything he loved to the ground. It was only fair that he did the same.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sooooo sorry about the delay with this chapter. I've been moving which has been pretty crazy for me and my grandfather just died so life is all over the place but I hope you enjoy this.

Despite the rebel’s growing activities, Lothal still continued to be a fairly peaceful planet. The people respected the Empire’s rule and for the most part did not rebel against what they all knew was inevitable. Order and obedience, just the way Pryce liked it. So it was of great surprise to her when Yularen contacted her on the holoprojector. 

“I have heard some…. disturbing rumors,” Colonal Yularen said to a disinterested Pryce.

“What kind of rumors?” She asked, not even bothering to look up from her datapad. 

“Rumors regarding the Rebels on Lothal,” Yularen said. “Is it true that there is a Lasat among the members of this cell?”

“I do not know the particulars of the members of the cell,” Pryce said with a dismissive wave of her hand, “But I would hardly be concerned, the Lasat where slaughtered on Lasan.” 

“Not all of them,” Yularen said. 

“I wouldn’t concern yourself, even if there is a Lasat it will be captured along with-“

“No,” Yularen sternly said, finally getting Pryce to look up from her datapad to stare at him in confusion. “The lasat and any other lasat you encounter will be killed on site.”

“If this Lasat is a rebel though-“

“Killing any and every Lasat you discover is more important then a wild goose chase trying to find a larger rebellion,” Yularen snapped. “Besides you will have the rest of the cell to interrogate you do not need the Lasat alive.”

“I certainly won’t say no to helping exterminate the beasts from the Galaxy,” Pryce admitted with a twisted grin. 

“Good,” Yularen said. “Do not fail me.” Before cutting off communication. Strange, usually Yularen was not one for such violence, but she was hardly going to complain about orders to eradicate those animals from the Galaxy. The rebels would have died eventually anyways, he would just be lucky enough to not have to watch his friends die a slow and painful death. 

\-----

Zeb quickly lost track of time while handing out food for the people of Tarkintown, before he knew it the crates where empty, it was dark, and the kid was gone. Zeb didn’t really care, kid was a nuisance anyways, as long as he didn’t take anything, he didn’t care what the kid did. 

Eventually Sabine and Zeb made their way back to the Ghost where Kanan and Hera where anxiously waiting for them. 

“Is everything okay?” Zeb asked, the kid momentarily shoved out of his mind. 

“We have word on where the wookies are being held.”

“The wookies?” Zeb asked, ears perking up. After Lasan had fallen and the Wookies had discovered he was alive, they had been the first to often him sanctuary amongst their own. Maybe in a different life, he would have accepted, but he had been too angry, too desperate to spill the blood of the monsters that took everything from him.

They offered though; they helped his people when the entire galaxy turned their backs. He would not turn his back on them not when they need his help. 

“Where?” Zeb asked. 

“They’re being transported as we speak, we have the coordinates for the jump point.”

“If we can catch them before they make the jump, we just might be able to save them,” Kanan finished. 

“We have to save them,” Zeb said. 

“I agree,” Hera said. Luckily everyone was in agreement with the mission and they immediately started making plans for how they would free the Wookies, that is until Ezra suddenly toppled into the room from the vents.

“Hey guys….” Ezra sheepishly said with a nervous hand wave. 

“Why don’t we just dump him here and go?” Zeb growled as he roughly dragged the kid to his feet.

“We can’t, he knows too much about our plan,” Sabine said. “We have to take him with us.”

“You can’t do that!” Ezra cried horrified. 

“We can, and we will.” Zeb growled, “we will not let you mess up this mission, it’s way too important.”

“So you’re going to keep me as a prisoner?”

“We’ll take you back after the mission,” Kanan said. “For now we have to move, we don’t have much time before we lose the wookies for good.”

“Whose gonna watch him?” Zeb growled. 

“He’ll stay with me in the cockpit,” Hera gently said, and without another word, turned and left, Ezra wisely trailing behind her. At least while with Hera he couldn’t get into much trouble. Or he hoped. He couldn’t worry about that right now, right now they had to focus on how they were going to rescue the wookies. The problem was they didn’t have time to come up with a good plan, they had to act now, which resulted in a half-baked plan that Zeb was certain could never work, but it was honestly the best they could do. 

The fact that they were able to dock with the ship was almost a surprise for Zeb, he didn’t think they’d get this far into their insane plan. Despite getting further then expected, the plan still fell apart painfully early. Zeb tried to warn them the troopers would never buy he was a hairless wookie, never mind the fact that he had fur, he was purple and no wookie in the history of ever had been purple. It seemed Kanan thought the troopers were complete morons though because despite this he still was going to go through with the ridiculous plan. 

As Zeb predicted, the plan fell to pieces before it had even started. Of course, Kanan got angry for him for realizing before the troopers put blaster bolts in them. It didn’t matter though, they needed to focus on finding and saving the wookies, no matter what. It was chaos, Zeb quickly lost track of the plan and where everyone was and what they and he were supposed to be doing. In the midst of the chaos it became apparent the wookies were nowhere on this ship. But if they weren’t here, where were they? They didn’t have time to figure that out, they needed to make sure they got out okay.

All Zeb could think about was getting out, and getting everyone, he loved out. The fear of losing his new family consumed it, made him ill thinking about losing anyone else to the cruelty of the Empire. So he fought, he tore through troopers and left no witnesss. And then in a blink of an eye they were back on the Ghost and they were safely in hyperspace. Just as suddenly as the adrenalin rush hit him, it was gone and he was on the floor, completely drained of every ounce of energy that was in him. 

With a heavy and pained sigh, Zeb let his head thunk against the cool wall of the Ghost, letting it reground him. Let him refocus. This was not Lasan. That was in the past, he was safe. His family was safe. 

“Zeb?” Hera asked, concern in her voice. 

“’M fine,” Zeb grunted, slowly opening his eyes. But his words did not seem to ease her concern. 

“Where’s Ezra?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one is a little short but it's kind of how the chapter ended. Hope you guys still enjoy it!

He left the kid behind. He actually left a kriffing kid behind in the hands of the Empire, what had he done? How had he failed again so horrifically? Was all he was capable of was failing people? The rest of the Ghost Crew was completely oblivious to his inner turmoil as they all bickered over whether or not they should go and save the kid they he left behind. 

What have you done you monster?

“They’ll know we’re coming,” Sabine said. “We can’t risk it, besides he’s a kid they won’t hurt him-“

“Him being a kid doesn’t change a thing,” Zeb growled. “They’ll slaughter kids still in the cradle.” Causing a tense silence to fall through the Ghost. They knew he was right, they knew what happened on Lasan. He could still sometimes hear their screaming….

“That still doesn’t make going any less dangerous or any wiser,” Sabine slowly said. “We have no choice.”

“Just because its dangerous doesn’t mean its not right-” Zeb argued. 

“We cannot just leave him, then we’re no better then the Empire!” Hera said.

“We need to be bet-“ Zeb was trying to say, but no one was listening.

“It’s a war-“

“He’s just a kid who only was even on that ship to warn you about the trap-“

“Well Zeb’s the one who left him behind!” She was right. It was his fault. He was a pathetic failure to everyone he cared about. He was a danger to the Galaxy. 

“We all failed him, we need to go back.” Why wouldn’t anyone let him speak up for himself? Did they think he was too dumb to think for himself? 

“It’s not our fault the Empire snatched him!”

Too much, too much talking and shouting. Too many people and voices and thoughts. Too many questions and thoughts and decisions crushing him, demanding his attention in that moment, none of them willing to leave him alone. So many thoughts swirled in his mind that he couldn’t even begin to try and focus on a single one. He wanted everything to just stop so he could think. But no one was paying attention to him, no one cared that he was about to have a complete mental breakdown in the middle of the galley. All they could focus on was screaming out their own thoughts and opinions in a desperate plea to be right because in that moment his wonderfully stubborn family refused to back down. 

He wanted, needed, to be alone so he could think in peace. But he couldn’t move or even speak, his entire being frozen in place, too overwhelmed to do anything to try and get away from the chaos to find a moment of peace to think and breath. All he could do was stand their as the yelling grew more intense and heated, as everyone tried to get the others attention and out their two cents in. He didn’t even know who was on whose side and he didn’t care. He just wanted to get away from the noise and thinking but he couldn’t. All he could do was stand their as the thoughts swirled in his mind in an increasingly overwhelming manner.

You’re a failure.

You got your husband and your people killed. Now you’ve gotten a child killed. 

They only keep you around because they pity you. They could never live with themselves for being the reason a species went completely extinct even though you deserve to be the one who died. 

They hate you, they loath you. 

Did he regret loving me?

He tried to block out the thoughts, but they wouldn’t leave him alone. 

“Zeb? Zeb what’s wrong?” Hera’s worried voice cut through his swirling thoughts for one brief moment. But they quickly came crashing back through his mind, leaving him mute and unable to form a coherent response. On some level he was aware of the fact that he was kneeling on the ground with his hands over his ears, but how ridiculous he looked in the moment didn’t matter. He just needed it all to stop. 

“It’s going to be okay. We’re going to fix this.” They didn’t understand. That wasn’t the problem. They didn’t want to know the problem though. They didn’t want to hear what he had to say. None of it mattered. 

“Just talk to us,” Hera soothingly said. And for a moment, he believed she cared and wanted to hear what he had to say. But his stupid traitorous tongue refused to work with him. 

“I….couldn’t….” Zeb finally forced out, choking on a sob. Couldn’t save his Alex. Couldn’t save his father. Couldn’t save his people. Couldn’t save Ezra. Couldn’t, couldn’t, couldn’t-

“Couldn’t what?” Hera gently asked. 

“Don’t get so worked up over some kid,” Sabine said. She was trying to help him feel better, but that wasn’t the problem. Or maybe it was, he wasn’t even sure anymore. He just needed to be alone to think and sort it all out, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t get the words out. Not that anyone would have heard even if he could. 

“Zeb, Zeb talk to me,” Hera softly said, but Zeb weakly shook his head, unable to force himself to say what was going on. “….come on, let me get you somewhere quieter.” Zeb tried to get to his feet, but everything was shaking too much as his body refused to cooperate with him. Hera thankfully seemed to realize he wasn’t moving anytime soon and turned to Sabine and Kanan and said, 

“Both of you quiet!” Her tone leaving no room to argue. Immediately they both clamped their mouths shut. “Zeb, what’s going on?”

“I-I feel like a failure….I feel like I-I can’t do anything right-“ Zeb reluctantly whispered. “I’m terrified the kid will be hurt o-or worse because I lost focus a-and let my fears get the best of me at the worst moment-“

“It’s war Zeb-“

“You don’t think I know that!” Zeb snapped. “You really think I of all people don’t know this is a war? You don’t think I remember their screams? Don’t remember what it was like realizing I failed them all? I should have protected them but I couldn’t! I couldn’t protect any of them just like I couldn’t protect the kid-…” Zeb trailed off, struggling to breath as the almost crushing weight of it all threatened to crush him. 

“Zeb-“ Hera said. 

“All I can do is fail….” Zeb whispered, staring at his hands. 

“That’s not true Zeb,” Hera said. 

“Isn’t it?” Zeb cried. “My people are dead and the kid is the hands of a murderous empire and it’s all my fault!”

“We all failed him,” Kanan firmly said. “We all should have been looking out for him, not just you. We failed together, and now we’re going to fix this together.”

“W-what if-“

“No what if’s, no more worrying about what might happen. We do this together, and together we will succeed.” Kanan firmly said. “Now, let’s go save that kid.”


	4. Chapter 4

Ezra knew he shouldn’t have gone onto the ship to help a bunch of complete strangers. Sure they were doing what they could to stick it to the Empire and he could respect that, but he should have learned by now that he couldn’t trust anyone but himself. Should know that he should only person he should be looking out for was himself. No one would look after him after all?

Ezra stared blankly at the wall in front of him, trying to figure out a way to escape…

Before he could think of anything, the door opened and an agent in all black walked into his cell saying, “Hello, I am Agent Blaise of ISB. I imagine you know why you’re here.” The agent was a tall and well-built man with dark skin and a full black beard with icy blue eyes. 

“Wrong place wrong time?” Ezra said with a shrug. 

“Is that what you call associating with Rebels?” Agent Blaise asked. 

“I’d hardly call it associating-“

“Don’t play dumb,” Agent Blaise snapped. “You will tell me all you know of this rebel cells activities.”

“I really don’t know anything!” Ezra said. 

“Hmm….” Blaise said, looking down at Ezra with curiosity. “It doesn’t matter, regardless. Soon your rebel friends will be here and we will capture them.”

“You’re crazy if you think they’ll come back for me,” Ezra mumbled. “I’m no one.”

“You underestimate these rebels’ capacity for compassion,” Agent Blaise said. “That compassion will be their destruction.” With that he turned and left Ezra alone again. In vein Ezra started looking through his pockets to find anything to help him escape, only finding the strange cube he had stolen from Kanan’s room. 

“All I have is this useless thing,” Ezra snapped, throwing at as far away from him as possible before curling up into a ball, blissfully unaware of the cube slowly shifting until a voice started speaking,

“This is Master Obi Wan Kenobi.” Shocked, Ezra looked up to see a projection of a man. “I regret to report that both our Jedi Order and the Republic, have fallen with a dark shadow of the Empire rising to take their place. This message is a warning and a reminder for any surviving Jedi. Trust in The Force. Do not return to the Temple…that time has passed. And our future is uncertain. We will each be challenged. Our trust. Our faith. Our friendships. But we must persevere. And in time, a new hope will emerge. May the Force be with you, always.” 

Ezra didn’t know why, but somehow the words were not only comforting but inspiring. Pushing him to do better, to be better. But to do so, he needed to escape. He was a lothrat though, so it was time to do what lothrats do best.

\----

They had wanted to make the rescue quick, Zeb just never imagined it would be this quick. As soon as they landed, they were running and a buckethead was in front of and Zeb and his fist was flying at the buckets head, knocking them to the ground and suddenly Ezra was standing up and yelling at him,

“Why did you do that? First you leave me behind then you punch me?”

“I-I didn’t leav-“

“Discuss this later!” Hera snapped. “Everyone back on the Ghost now!” Ezra though suddenly ran the opposite direction from the ship.

“Oh no you don’t!” Zeb cried, lunging for him. 

“I need this for my collection!” Ezra cried as he scooped up the helmet he was wearing. 

“Just get in the ship!” Zeb snapped, grabbing him by the collar and throwing him towards the ship. Ezra threw a glare at him but thankfully did as Zeb said and ran onto the safety of the Ghost, Zeb and the others quickly following and then they where in hyperspace. 

“Good to have you back,” Hera gently said once everyone was in the cockpit.

“Shame about the wookies though,” Kanan sighed. 

"I know where they're really taking the Wookiees. Have you heard of the spice mines of Kessel?" 

“The Wookies wouldn’t last long there,” Hera whispered. 

“Well then lets go rescue them,” Ezra said.

“Don’t you want us to take you home first?” Hera asked. 

“Someone’s got to help them,” Ezra said with an awkward shrug. Hera beamed at him before saying, 

“Alright, setting coordinates for Kessel.”

\---

“You are to return to Lothal immediately Agent Blaise,” Governor Pryce was saying. 

“Governor I fear that the Rebels may know the wookies are being transported to Kessel and are heading-“

“Do you have any evidence of this?” Governor Pryce asked. 

“No but they where able to find and rescue the boy-“

“That hardly proves they’ll find the Wookies,” Governor Pryce dismissively said. “You have more important work to do here.”

“There is something more important then ensuring the prisoners-“

“Yes,” governor Pryce snapped. “The rebels will be returning to Lothal and you must be there to intercept them when they do.”

“Yes Governor,” Blaise stiffly said, realizing the argument was in vein. 

“Good,” Pryce said, immediately cutting the connection. “Well, you heard her! Set coordinates for Lothal.”

“Calculating,” one of his officers said. 

“Prepare for hyperspace.” This was a mistake, that he knew for a fact. The Rebels where likely heading to Kessel as they prepared for Lothal, and the troopers their would be woefully unprepared for the incoming attack- they didn’t have to be though.

“Lieutenant! Send word to Kessel, warn them of a potential incoming Rebel attack!” Agent Blaise ordered. 

“Yes sir,” The lieutenant said. 

“Ready to enter hyperspace,” another crewmember declared. 

“Set course for Lothal,” Agent Blaise said. Almost immediately the ship entered hyperspace as the lieutenant cried, 

“Sir! I’ve received word from Kessel, they are under attack!”

“Already?” Blaise said in amazement. 

“Yes sir.”

“Interesting…” Blaise said a small smile spreading across his face. They would surely lose the wookies, but that didn’t matter. The Rebels already attacking meant they where willing to rush in with little preparation. A dangerous move that this time worked in their favor, but if his theory was correct this weakness would ultimately be their downfall. All he had to do was set the perfect trap to exploit this weakness and the rebels would be his. 

_Savor this victory Rebels, for next time, you will be mine._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I meant to post this earlier today before work but well things got a little crazy but here it is!! I have been so excited to post this chapter so I hope you guys like it!

Agent Blaise was not a patient man, he was even less patient when Governor Pryce was on his ass about something like she was right now. She refused to tell him why, but the Lasat in the rebel cell was to be killed with extreme prejudice. And while he certainly didn’t care what happened to the Lasat, he had been hoping he could interrogate him about Rebel activities before he was executed, but apparently, he wasn’t going to be so lucky. Governor Pryce was quick to dismiss his objections to not being allowed to even interrogate him insisting he would have the rest of the crew and losing the Lasat wouldn’t be an issue. 

Theoretically she was correct, he did have the remaining members of the cell to interrogate, but the Lasat might have information the remaining members of the cell didn’t. Some rebel cells had been known to compartmentalize information, ensuring only one member knew certain key facts in an attempt to keep the Empire from finding out too much information about their activities should one member be captured. It was unfortunately a very effective plan and was what so far was keeping the Empire from completely eradicating them. And killing members of the Rebellion without questioning them only ensured crucial information stayed out of the Empire’s hands and kept the ever-growing Rebellion alive. 

Governor Pryce though was too short sighted to understand all of this. All she cared about was pleasing whoever gave the order to kill the lasat. Blaise enjoyed the hunt, he took great pleasure in taking on difficult tasks that pushed his abilities and forced him to see all the different angles to achieve victory. He thrived in challenge and adversity. Pryce was different, Pryce had a bloodlust that she could not control. A bloodlust that Blaise was certain would be her undoing. 

“Agent Blaise,” An icy voice said. 

“That would be me,” Blaise said. “Who are you?”

“Colonal Yularen sent me to help deal with your Lasat problem,” The man said. “You may call me Darryn.”

“Alright Darryn,” Blaise slowly said, barely stopping himself from rolling his eyes. “Care to tell me why Yularen does not think ISB can handle this?”

“You haven’t handled it yet,” Darryn casually said. “Yularen believes if you have not been able to handle the problem yet, you never will.” Blaise bristled at the comment, how dare he imply ISB could not handle this problem. He was not some naïve cadet fresh out of the academy and thrust into a mission he could not handle. He knew how to take down Rebel cells. He knew where to hit them where it hurt, knew their greatest weakness’s and how to exploit them. With someone tying his hands however it was making this that much more difficult. His assets where being diverted to critical missions that he was not allowed to know of. Whoever was behind this was someone who could not see the greater picture that was being put at risk by this wild goose chase. Someone who did not want to admit the growing threat the rebellion brought to the peace they only had just managed to get.

“I will have you know that ISB is more than capable of handling-“

“Maybe, maybe not,” Darryn said. “That is irrelevant now. Yularen has sent me and paid me, so I will do what you have been unable to do thus far.” 

Was Yularen the one pulling the strings? Was he the reason behind his assets being diverted? On the surface it didn’t make sense, but Yularen was the one who hired this bounty hunter who was now saying he needed to help take down the Lasat who was ordered to be killed with extreme prejudice with no real reason to do so. Was he the one that ordered the Lasat be killed? Why did he hate the Lasat so much? Yes they were beasts, but Yularen was taking this extermination of them to a dangerous degree. The kind of obsession he was showing, if it was him, was dangerous. Obsessions had a way of completely consuming someone, leaving them unable to think of anything but the thing that they where obsessed over. 

“I have a plan to not only exterminate the lasat but to also help you capture the rest of the rebels the Lasat associates himself with,” Darryn said. “Something you have been thus far unable to do.”

Darryn’s words made Blaise bristle with anger. They hardly even had a chance to try and capture them. The Empire had not really had any reason to believe the Rebels would discover them bringing the ion disruptors back into production, not that in all honesty Blaise minded the Rebels thwarting that particular plan. Though the lasat where beasts, those weapons had no business being brought back, especially to be used against anything really. Still by the time they realized the Rebels knew of them, it was simply a case of trying to minimize the damage they inflicted. 

“And how do you plan on doing that?” Blaise asked, earning a twisted smirk from Darryn.

“Lasan’s prince will be their demise.” 

\-----------------------

“Zeb, Zeb! Come here quick!” Ezra cried. 

“Why?”

“Senator Trayvis is about to send out another broadcast!” 

Zeb let out a heavy sigh not at all interested but also realizing Ezra would be upset if he didn’t come. Senator Trayvis’s messages lifted something in Ezra, brought a spark back into his eyes that was painfully not there when he first joined them. He wanted to see Ezra be happy like a kid should be, but today was not a good day for him. Alex’s birthday was today, and all he could think about was him. His laugh, his smile, the feeling of his smaller hands in his as he looked into his beautiful amber eyes-

“Hello Zeb!” Ezra said, waving his hand in front of Zeb’s face. “Anybody in there?”

“Shove off,” Zeb snapped. 

“But Hera wants us all to watch!” Ezra said. “Come on!” Zeb really didn’t want to, he wanted to just be alone to wallow in his misery, but he knew no one would let him. Not unless he told them-

“…..alright,” Zeb reluctantly sighed, forcing the dangerous thoughts out of his mind. He couldn’t break down now. 

“Hurry up!” Ezra cheered as he turned and raced back to the Ghost. Zeb wanted to just lay in the grass and not follow him, but he knew Ezra would be upset if he didn’t, so reluctantly he dragged himself to his feet and made his way to the Ghost, the transmission already being broadcast. 

“-demanding that the Empire release who this man is and why he has been imprisoned.” Trayvis was saying as an image was shown of the man in question to show a face Zeb was certain he would never see again in this life. Alex. There was a heaviness under his eyes that seemed to age him decades, but Zeb knew that face better than his own. The meticulously kept sideburns, his strong jaw, his intense eyes-

“Zeb? You okay?” Hera asked, concern in her voice. Zeb wanted to respond, but he couldn’t get the needed air into his lungs. It was as if time itself had stopped and there was nothing else in the universe. The image changed and security footage started playing of a pair of troopers escorting him in handcuffs to somewhere. 

“Zeb? Do you know him?” Sabine asked. 

“He’s Lasan’s prince,” Zeb breathed, unable to bring himself to say the word husband. He couldn’t get his hopes up, not yet. Not until he was actually in his arms again. 

“Umm….Zeb he’s human-“ Ezra slowly said. 

“I remember hearing the outcry when the future king married a human,” Kanan said.

“Why did people not from Lasan care what Lasan’s king decided to do?”

“They were angry at the prince actually,” Kanan explained, “They claimed he was betraying his species since he was a human marrying a lasat. Most people refused to acknowledge his marriage to the king, claiming a human and a Lasat could not be allowed to marry.”

“Well that’s stupid,” Ezra grumbled. 

“Can we focus!” Zeb snapped, angry there wasn’t more urgency with the situation at hand. “We have to rescue him!”

“I agree,” Hera said. “I’ll get the Ghost ready.”

“We’ll come up with a plan,” Kanan said. 

“We’ll need one,” Hera said as she made her way back to the cockpit. 

“Don’t worry big guy,” Kanan gently said, placing a hand on his shoulder, “We will save him.”

“Right,” Zeb stiffly said. _We have to….I don’t think I could survive losing him again._


	6. The Gilded Mansion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be honest, I have been agonizing over this chapter for weeks now terrified of posting it. I've written it completely then scrapped everything to write it again because I was trying so hard to make this chapter absolutely perfect and was just so scared of posting it. I even started work on the next chapter if you can believe it to put off 'finishing' this chapter to post it. And yes, doing the rewrite did make this chapter so much better I think and I am proud of myself for really taking a lot more time to edit and reedit and add extra scenes in, I think if I keep editing I may never post this so here it finally is, I hope you enjoy it.

Zeb could barely breath and the Ghost traveled through hyperspace. He knew he needed to focus, needed to calm his mind and prepare for the inevitable fight that was to come, but how could he focus? He was about to be reunited with the love of his life, a man he thought died a horrific death along with his people. He’d thought Alex was gone forever, but instead the Ashla was giving him a chance to see his soulmate once again. 

Distantly he heard the others talking and reviewing the plan one last time, and he knew he needed to focus. Needed to center himself and make sure he knew the plan backwards and forwards, but he couldn’t. Alex was within reach, he could hold him in his arms again and kiss him, never letting go. It was all he could think about as they approached the prison, despite telling himself over and over again he could not let himself get his hopes up. If this was all a trap then he was only setting himself up to get his heart shattered again, and he did not believe his heart could handle being completely broken again like that.

“….are we sure this is the right place?” Kanan asked. “It looks more like a mansion then a prison.”

“The intel is solid,” Sabine firmly said. 

“If Yularen was behind his capture, this is definitely the place,” Zeb sourly said. He still remembered Yularen’s increasingly obsessive behavior on his few visits. Begging him to ‘come home’. Insisting he could rejoin the Empire if he left, demanding he left Lasan ‘for the good of the empire’, getting more obsessed with taking him back to Coruscant and away from the ‘beasts’.

“I’m going to land the Ghost in the hills,” Hera informed them, but Zeb was barely listening, consumed by the memory of Yularen’s final visit to Lasan before it fell. He had been in a meeting with the council and his father once again pleading his case to the council about crowning Alex when Arnon had burst in.

_“Captain! You are needed immediately!”_

_“What’s wrong?” Efrem asked, ignoring the councils protests to the intrusion._

_“The human visitor has gone crazy, he’s trying to force Alex to come with him. He pulled out his weapon and shot one of his guards.” Without another word Efrem ran out of the council’s chambers and followed him, Zeb hot on his tail as Efrem asked,_

_“Is the guard dead?”_

_“No luckily, it was not a killing blow,” Arnon said._

_“Where are they right now?” Zeb asked, in a complete panic._

_“They were in the main entrance hall,” Arnon said. “He’s got his blaster on Alex, threatening to kill him if the guards didn’t let them pass. Alex is trying to talk him down right now.”_

_“He’s insane if he thinks he’s getting out alive if any harm comes to Alex,” Zeb growled, ready to kill the bastard himself._

_“Maybe he is,” Efrem mumbled as they approached the hall. “Zeb maybe you sh-“_

_“No,” Zeb firmly said. “That is my husband in there.”_

_“I fear you going in may only escalate the situation.”_

_“The situation is already escalated!”_

_“No one is dead and I would like to keep it that way,” Efrem firmly said. “No-“ Before he could finish his thought, the sound of blaster fire filled the air, throwing all of Zeb’s self-resolve out the window. With little regard for his own safety Zeb charged through the doors into the hall as Yularen shouted,_

_“That was my last warning shot! Move or he’s dead!” Zeb’s blood ran cold as he looked at the scene before him. The guards at the door did not move from their defensive stance in front of the door as Yularen glared at them, flanked by a pair of bucket heads, Alex firmly held in one arm, the other pointing the blaster at his temple._

_“Yularen listen to me,” Alex calmly said, trying to hide his clear panic. “Just put down the blaster and we can talk. No one else needs to get hurt-“_

_“I will not just leave you with these animals!” Yularen snapped. “I don’t know what they’ve done to you but this nonsense ends now!”_

_“They haven’t hurt me,” Alex assured._

_“Let him go right now!” Zeb roared, unable to listen to another word out of the slimeball’s mouth._

_“You!” Yularen roared, arm twitching, clearly resisting the urge to move his blaster away from Alex and shoot him. Good. The second he moved he knew Alex would be able to get away. “You corrupted him! Defiled him with your sick vileness!”_

_“I didn’t do anything to him,” Zeb said. “When I proposed, he could have chosen to say no. And even after he said yes he was free to leave at any time he wanted if he changed his mind.”_

_“Liar!” Yularen cried. “He’s nothing but a prisoner! I’m going to set him free.”_

_“Alex,” Efrem said. “Are you alright?”_

_“I’m okay,” Alex assured. “But I think Yularen has some concerns about my safety and wellbeing here and could use some reassurance’s that I am being very well cared for here.”_

_“Shut up!” Yularen said, pressing his blaster more firmly against Alex. “We’re leaving right now and I am going to get him the help he so desperately needs before it is too late!”_

_“Before what?” Efrem calmly said, catching his attention. “Nothing is going to happen to him here.” Out of the corner of his eyes he saw the guards slowly inching closer to Yularen while he was distracted. He expected the troopers to alert Yularen to what they were doing, but the troopers did not. It seemed even they did not like what Yularen was doing._

_“Oh if only you knew!” Yularen cried. “You’ll be his demise! His complete and total destruction! I refuse to let that happen to him, and I don’t care who I have to kill to do it!” Finally, Yularen pulled his blaster away from Alex to aim it at his father. Just then Alex elbowed Yularen before grabbing his arm and twisting it to the blaster hit the ground, the guards immediately moving in to grab Yularen and shove him to the ground._

_“You’re all making a mistake!” Yularen roared. “The last mistake any of you beasts will ever make!”_

_“Alex!” Zeb cried, racing to Alex, pulling him into his arms, Alex melting against him, whispering,_

_“I’m okay, it’s okay. He didn’t hurt me.”_

_“You!” Yularen roared, jerking towards Alex, the guards having to yank him back. “You’ve decided your fate and you will have to live with that choice!”_

_“I am happy here Yularen,” Alex said, ice in his voice. “Nothing will ever convince me to leave Zeb’s side. This is my home now and these are my people. I have no place with the Empire any more.”_

_“We’ll see about that,” he spat as he was dragged away, the troopers following, another set of guards taking their weapons away._

Looking back on it now, Zeb realized that not only did Yularen know about Lasan’s fate, but he very likely had a hand in it. He also probably had built this prison in preparation for that very day, ensuring he had a place to keep Alex locked up while it happened to keep him alive. Worse, Zeb realized that Yularen had planned for Lasan to fall before trying to take Alex away, but when foiled, he was the one who ensured Alex made it off of Lasan alive, whether or not he wanted to.

He couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he had ignored Alex’s wishes and kept Yularen locked up instead of releasing him if things might have gone differently….

Sabine clearly looked like she wanted to ask for clarification but decided against it. They had a mission to focus on, something Zeb was struggling to do. All he could think about was the fact that soon he’d be seeing his love again. He knew thinking like this was dangerous, he had to remind himself that there was a possibility Alex was not alive. He needed to not let himself get his hopes up. Needed to keep himself in check, not get his hopes up. But this was Alex his sweet wonderful loving Alex who was his entire galaxy. How could he not get his hopes up? How could he not tear down anything and anyone that stood between him and his love?

In his minds eye he could vividly picture him, every beautifully perfect detail, his voice, his scent, the way the sun reflected off of his golden hair. His compassion and commitment, his love of Lasan. His stubbornness in even the smallest things and how it used to drive him crazy. Now he craved for even the arguments, because it meant Alex was alive.

“Zeb!” Kanan hissed, snapping Zeb back to reality. “Let’s go!”

He could barely focus on anything but the thought of Alex as they carefully made their way into the prison, his body operating on autopilot as memories from another life flashed before his eyes. Lazy kisses beneath the afternoon sun, Zeb spinning Alex across the dance floor, them making sweet love in the dead of night-

“Zeb!” Sabine hissed, snapping Zeb back to reality. “Follow the plan!” How could he though? Alex was finally within reach again. Completely disregarding every thought of his own safety and the plan, Zeb started tearing through the halls, his mind focusing on getting himself back to Alex. He ignored the calls of his friends, ignored how odd it was that he faced no troopers in his path. Nothing but Alex mattered. 

Even the inside of the prison tried to make itself appear more as a home then a prison. Lush rugs and tapestries adorned the floors and walls. Intricate paintings hung on the walls and incredible statues scattered the place. Yularen had built a gilded prison for Alex, trying to create some sort of twisted fantasy with Alex living the perfect life he imagined he would live, completely ignoring any wish about his life Alex had. Did he have Lasan destroyed solely to capture Alex and bring him here? Zeb tried not to think too hard about that and focused his energy on trying to find where Alex was currently being held. 

Logically a prisoner would be held in the basement, harder to break out, only one access point in and out, the prisoner loses all sense of time without any sun or moonlight to mark the passage of time. This wasn’t about making Alex a prisoner though; this was Yularen who was trying to pretend Alex never went to Lasan and never fell in love with him. This was some sick and twisted fantasy. No Alex would be kept in one of the bedrooms. Just as Kanan and Ezra caught up to him, Zeb was racing up the stairs, the pair frantically chasing after him. Zeb ran, heart pounding, ready to burst from joy at the mere thought of seeing his Alex again. 

It wasn’t difficult at all for him to find the door that held Alex, locked and sealed, meant to keep someone from escaping. Not even bothering to wait for the others, Zeb opened the door to reveal Alex, sitting on the bed. At the sound of the door opening, he turned to face Zeb, a grin spreading across his face as tears filled Zeb’s eyes. He was here. He was alive, this was really happening. 

“I can’t believe it,” Alex whispered, standing up and slowly approaching Zeb His voice was just as beautiful as he remembered. He was just as Zeb remembered, soft amber eyes, light freckles dusting his face, beautiful golden hair and the gorgeous mutton chops that Zeb had always found so attractive.

“It’s real,” Zeb began, “It’s m-“

“I can’t believe someone’s finally come to rescue me,” Alex continued, making Zeb freeze. Heart turning to ice in his chest. Someone? Did he really not recognize Zeb? No, he would never forget. That’s when it finally registered in his brain that this stranger’s scent did not match Alex’s at all. Despite the years or separation Zeb knew Alex’s scent better then his own, it was ingrained into his very soul and he could never forget. Scents changed some over time, but at the core their was always something that always remained the same, and this persons scent was not his Alex’s. 

“Who are you?” Zeb growled as Kanan and Ezra ran into the room. 

“Your highness-“ Kanan began but Zeb more loudly repeated as he blocked the other two from entering,

“Who are you?”

“I-I’m surprised you don’t recognize me,” The fake said. “I am Alexsandr Orrelio-“

“Liar!” Zeb roared, rushing across the room towards him, slamming the fake against the wall, “You are not him! Who are you?” The fake’s face twisted into a sick smirk as he said,

“You must have been very close to him, tell me who was he to you?”

“Like you care you bastard!” Zeb roared. 

“So you don’t want to tell me about how important he was to you, or how dishonorable it is that I’m soiling his good name wearing his face?” He tauntingly asked, Zeb merely let out a threating growl to which he merely shrugged and said, “It doesn’t really matter in the end. You will all die here.”

“Where is the real Alex?” Zeb growled. “What did you do to him?”

“I did nothing to him,” The fake said. “He died here, desperately waiting for someone, anyone, to come and save him. He was so sure he would be saved, but when no one came he died, a miserable and heartbroken man.”

“No…” Zeb whispered, the world crumbling around him as the reality of having lost the love of his life again hit him. Alex was gone, all because he hadn’t bothered _looking._ If only he’d tried harder. Searched, believed that maybe others had survived, he would have gotten to Alex on time-

“Don’t worry,” The fake assured, “Soon you’ll be joining him.” Suddenly pain seared through his stomach and with a scream of pain, Zeb dropped the fake, crumpling to the floor. Though deep down, he wasn’t sure if it was the knife in his stomach or the fact that Alex was truly gone once more that was causing him the most pain. 

“No!” A voice screamed as the fake gasped and was flung away as alarms started blaring. 

“None of you are getting out of here alive!” A new voice cockily said. “I’m going to skin that one alive.” Good Zeb thought, not even bothering to look up. If he died, he could finally be with his Alex again and then all of this pain would be over. He and Alex would be together again in peace, where no one and nothing could ever hurt them. 

“You wish,” Kanan growled, the sound of his lightsaber igniting hitting Zeb’s ears. No He wanted to say, _I’m not worth revealing who you are! Just leave me!_ But it was too late, the deed was done and Kanan was effortlessly deflecting the blaster bolts being fired at them. But didn’t he see that Zeb just wanted to die?

“Come on Zeb! We’ve gotta go!” Ezra frantically said, trying to help him to his feet. “Y-you’re going to be okay! You’ve just got to stand up!”

“Just leave me,” Zeb whispered. “Let me die….” He was bleeding, there was so much blood, but he was completely numb to it. Death would soon come for him. And that was okay. 

“Don’t talk like that!” Ezra frantically said. “Please Zeb.”

“Zeb,” Kanan said. “I know this hurt, but don’t give up. He wouldn’t want you to just give up like this.”

“You don’t know what he wanted,” Zeb whispered, lightheaded, probably from the blood loss. Only partly certain they were even remotely talking about the same person. 

“He would want the same thing any other person would want for the person they love,” Kanan firmly said. “They would want them to fight, to live, to thrive and be happy. If not for yourself, do it for him. Do it so you can make sure what you’re feeling is not felt by anyone else every again.” Zeb didn’t want to fight anymore. He’d fought so hard for so long and for what? All of this pain and misery? He couldn’t even get the energy to open his mouth and say these things though as darkness danced across his vision and the floor very suddenly was rushing to his face.

_I’ll see you soon my love._ Was Zeb’s last thought as darkness consumed him completely. 

\----

When missions went wrong, Hera knew things could get pretty hairy, but the last thing she expected to find when Kanan called her for an emergency pickup was for three of her crewmembers to be desperately dragging Zeb back onto the Ghost, blood gushing from a stab wound.

“What happened?” Hera cried when she came down once the Ghost was safely in hyperspace.

“This whole thing was a set up,” Kanan grunted. “The prisoner was an imposter they stabbed Zeb. He’s in bad shape.”

“Kanan get the med kit and get him patched up, I’ll change the course to the nearest-“ Hera said, racing back to the cockpit, frantically making the calculations for the jump to hyperspace. “We’ll get Zeb to the nearest-“

“No!” Kanan said, “We need to get as far away as possible, they’ll be looking for us they know he’s hurt!” Hera wanted to object; they couldn’t put Zeb’s life in danger like that! But she also knew Kanan was right. They would be hunting them down mercilessly, especially given that they knew one of their crewmembers was hurt. With that thought in mind, Hera went back to the cockpit to start searching for a suitable planet for them to try and get to. 

Hera’s hands shook as she desperately tried to wrack her brain for anything that could help them at all. She needed to focus, but all she could see was blood pouring out of the stab would in Zeb’s abdomen. She had to focus, thinking about that would not help. There had been so much blood though-

Chopper frantically beeped beside her, dragging her from her dangerously spiraling thoughts back to reality. 

“Right Chop, got to focus,” Hera agreed. 

_What about Taris?_ Chopper beeped at her, making her freeze. It was a bit further than Hera would have liked, but the planet had low imperial presence and most importantly it was not far off from their current trajectory.

“That’s perfect Chop!” Hera cried, dropping them out of hyperspace and making the appropriate calculations. 

_Just don’t tell him._ Chopper demanded.

“Course not, wouldn’t want him thinking you actually cared,” Hera said with a small smirk. 

_Exactly. If he thought we were friends he might start asking me for favors._ Hera shook her head but continued her work before pausing and saying, 

“Can you reach out to Fulcrum? Maybe they have a contact that can help us out on Taris.”

\-----

Taris would not have been Kanan’s first choice of a planet to go to for help as the planet was still rebuilding and recovering from multiple attacks on the planet. But Zeb didn’t have the time for them to be picky, and with Fulcrum having a contact on the planet with access to better medical supplies then they had on hand, there was little room for argument. 

Luckily it seemed Fulcrums contact knew they where coming as the moment they landed they where greeted by a female Zabrak with yellow skin and black hair who whispered, 

“Are you the spectre’s from Lothal?” 

“Whose asking?” Kanan asked. She carefully lifted her ring and twisted the base to reveal a hidden Fulcrum symbol inside it saying,

“My name is Euqi, I was told one of your crewmembers is badly injured.”

“Yes,” Hera said. “He is in desperate need of Medical attention.”

“I have a med droid that can assist with transporting him to my home,” Euqi whispered. “Now hurry.” It was difficult getting Zeb out of the Ghost and to Euqi’s home without being seen, but with the help of the med droid they were able to get him safely inside and Euqi immediately got to work, shooing them away because she needed space, forcing them to sit and wait in the front room.

Waiting was the worst part and, with nothing better to do, Kanan found himself restlessly pacing the small room as Ezra sat cross legged, nervously tapping his fingers on his knee. Kanan could feel his nervous energy crackling through the force with his own, both of their fear building ontop of each other only serving to make each other more nervous.

“There is nothing else we can do right now,” Hera gently said, trying to calm the nervous energy that was building in the room. 

“I know,” Kanan said. 

“So why don’t you sit down and relax,” Hera said. 

“I am relaxed,” Kanan said as he continued to pace. 

“Sorry love but I really don’t believe you,” Hera said.

“What reason would I have to be nervous anyways,” Kanan continued, “I mean we’re only sitting ducks as we wait for one of our injured crewmembers to be healed after getting stabbed while breaking into a high security prison the Empire kept hidden and are probably being hunted down by people who know we are down a crewmember.”

“Why don’t you help me move the Ghost someplace safe?” Hera offered. “You clearly need something to help take your mind off of this.”

“What makes you say that,” Kanan tensely said. 

“That was not a request,” Hera said. 

“I am not leaving the kids alone with a stranger,” Kanan said. 

“I can take care of myself!” Ezra cried.

“And I can take care of him,” Sabine said with a smirk. 

“I don’t need a babysitter!” Ezra cried. 

“They’ll be fine,” Hera said. “Now come on.” Without another word, she turned and left the small home, leaving Kanan no choice but to follow her back out onto the streets, saying, 

“Behave you two.” Ignoring their protests as he stepped outside into the cool evening air. The walk back to the Ghost was short but mercifully quiet. He knew though the second they were safely aboard the Ghost that silence would end. Sure enough the second they where on board Hera faced him and asked him,

“You know Zeb is going to be okay right?”

“…I’m not so sure….” Kanan said. 

“What do you mean?”

“I mean when he heard Alex was dead he lost any desire to live,” Kanan said. “I could feel it….something inside him died in that room…and I’m not sure how he will be when he wakes up….”

“Whatever happens, we will work through it with him as a family,” Hera firmly said. 

“I just hope he does wake up…”

“He will,” Hera firmly said as she sat down in the cockpit. “He’s a warrior, he will not give up.”

Kanan wanted to believe it, he really did, but the agony he felt through the force, the single desire to die, he just hoped somehow someway Zeb found a way to try and live.

\-----------

It didn’t take long for them to find a place to hide the Ghost and walk back to Euqi’s house, but by the time they returned, Sabine and Ezra where not sitting in the main room and found Euqi waiting for them. 

“I patched up your friend. He is still unconscious but he will be okay.”

It was a relief to know he would be okay physically, but his mental health was what was currently worrying Kanan the most. He truly wanted to die after discovering Alex’s fate, ad between that and the fact that the imposter tried to declare himself an Orrelios, Kanan got the feeling that there was a lot to the story that they where all missing. 

“Are the others with him?” Hera asked. 

“Yes,” Euqi said, “I think you can join them. He is in the spare room in the back.”

“Thank you,” Hera gratefully said. “For everything.”

“Of course,” She replied, smiling softly at Hera. With that Kanan and Hera made their way through the hallway to the very back room where Sabine and Ezra where sitting on either side of the far too small bed Zeb was laying on. His jumpsuit rolled down to his waist where a bacta strip now covered the wound.

“Zeb’s going to be okay,” Sabine said when she saw Hera and Kanan standing in the doorway. 

“That’s good news,” Hera agreed, stepping into the room.

“I think Zeb wasn’t honest with us about who this guy was,” Ezra blurted out, Kanan silently groaning. He had been hoping the kid hadn’t caught on, no such luck apparently. 

“What do you mean?” Sabine defensively asked. Kanan could hardly blame her, she was extremely close to Zeb. The thought of him lying to her about something so big would certainly set her off.

“The imposter said his name was Alexsandr Orrelios,” Ezra said.

“Are you sure?” Sabine asked. 

“Positive,” Ezra said. “And he was furious when he realized he was a fake and right when we caught up he was saying he was a fake.”

“Is it-“

“I heard him say the name Orrelios as well,” Kanan sighed before Sabine could even finish asking the question.

“Is it possible Zeb lied about him being a royal to convince us to go after him?” Sabine slowly asked. 

“I doubt it,” Hera said. “There was a higher chance we would refuse to go after him because of the risk and the fact that they didn’t know each other. Them being married…I wouldn’t have even hesitated to go after him for Zeb.”

“So…. why wouldn’t Zeb tell us who he really was?” Ezra slowly asked. 

“Maybe he was scared,” Sabine said. “Scared of getting his hopes up too high before he knew it was all true….and that was probably a good thing to try and do given what happened….”

“In the end, Zeb is the only one who can really answer that question,” Hera said. “So until he wakes up, all we can do is be here for him and give him a reason to wake up and come back to us.”

“You think he won’t wake up?” Sabine asked. 

“I know…he truly just wanted to die back in that prison,” Kanan slowly said. “That is not going to be easy to come back from.”

“We’ll do whatever it takes to help him!” Ezra declared. “That’s what….what family does right?”

“Yea, it is,” Kanan agreed, pride filling him as he beamed at Ezra. He was really starting to remember what being a family was, maybe, just maybe, they really could heal the hurts the Empire had inflicted on so many people just a little.

“This will be hard, but we’ll be there for him, no matter what,” Kanan firmly said, meaning it with every fiber of his being. He would not lose anyone else, not if there was anything, he could possibly do to save him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...please don't kill me!
> 
> Before you ask, no their was never a version of this chapter where Alex and Zeb are truly reunited and I know that you guys have a lot of questions about this most likely but let me assure you that the next chapter does have some hints as to what really happened, and a lot of it is written but in rereading it I see a lot of stuff that probably should get changed some so I'm not sure when the next part will be up but I promise I will have it up as soon as I can.


	7. The In between

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Somewhere between life and death, Zeb reunites with someone special.

Dying was much less painful then Zeb thought it would be. One moment he was in complete agony, heart shattered into a million pieces as he realized he had lost his husband once more to the Empire, blood pouring out of him as he struggled to breathe properly, then the next he was no longer in pain, standing in the garden by his fathers house, feeling nothing but peace. It was wonderful, like the weight of the galaxy had finally been lifted off of his shoulders. 

It was then that Zeb noticed that he couldn’t see the castle’s imposing presence out in the distance. Zeb curiously glanced around the surrounding forest, a grin spreading across his face as he realized that there was nothing else in the forest. No one to try and force him to take on any princely duties, no one to demand anything from him or Alex-…Alex…why wasn’t he hear? In fact, why wasn’t anyone here? Not his father, his husband his friends, he was completely and utterly alone.

No, that couldn’t be possible. He was dead, everyone should be here. His chest painfully tightened as he tore to the house, ripping the door open and stumbling inside. Everything in the house was perfectly in order the way he remembered. 

“Hello? Dad? Alex? I’m here!” Zeb called out to the empty house. Nothing. No response, no movement. It was just him in the house. No, no this could not be! His family had to be here! They wouldn’t just leave him to be completely, alone would they? Struggling to breath, Zeb stumbled out of the house towards the forest, determined to find whoever was out there. Someone was out their he just had to find them. He couldn’t be alone! As Zeb approached the clearing, an invisible force pushed him back, preventing him from entering the forest beyond. 

“No….” Zeb whispered, placing his hands against the barrier, finding it stubbornly pushed back against him. He was trapped. Their was nowhere for him to go.

“Hello?” Zeb called out to the vast empty forest before him. “Is anyone here?” Silence. Deafening silence was his only response. Their really wasn’t anyone here. He was trapped in his old home with no one. Choking on a sob, Zeb dropped down to his knees. Why was he alone? He was supposed to be reunited with all of his loved one’s when he died, but here he was completely and utterly alone. Why was the Ashla doing this to him? Why was he forced to stay apart for all eternity from his loved ones? 

Was he being punished for not staying loyal to Alex after he died? Was the Ashla angry at him for giving into temptation in a moment of weakness and taking another to his bed? Why? It’s what Alex wished him to do, to find another and be happy. 

“Why?” Zeb screamed into the forest. Why was he damned to spend eternity with no one? Why did no one love him anymore? He had wanted to die so he could finally be with his loved ones again, and yet now that he was here, he was doomed to still not ever see them again. With an agonized roar, Zeb slammed his hands against the ground, over and over again, screaming in pain.

“I’m sorry,” Zeb weakly choked, wrapping his arms around himself, weakly sobbing. The Ashla truly hated him. Zeb, so consumed with his grief, did not hear the footsteps that approached him, nor did he notice the person kneeling on the ground in front of him until they placed a hand on his shoulder and whispered, 

“Zeb.” Gasping, Zeb looked up to find himself face to face with his Alex.

“A-Alex,” Zeb breathlessly gasped, barely able to believe it. 

“It’s me,” Alex whispered, cradling his face in his hands. Choking on a joy filled sob, Zeb threw himself at Alex, burying his face in Alex’s neck as he broke down sobbing, fingers desperately combing through his hair, trying to take in every inch of his being.

“Shhhh, I’m here love,” Alex tenderly whispered, rocking his in his arms as he tenderly stroked his ears. “I will never leave you again. You don’t have to suffer anymore. You’re safe.” Alex held Zeb in his arms, gently rocking him, until he’d gotten himself back under control, slowly lifting his head up to look Alex in the eyes as he whispered, 

“I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” Alex said. “But we’re together again, and that’s all that matters.” 

“I will never leave you again,” Zeb declared. 

“I know,” Alex assured, pulling Zeb into a passionate kiss, one that Zeb desperately returned, pouring years of love and longing into it, desperate to convey how much he still loved Alex, how much he still wanted him. Zeb started to pull away, but Alex pulled him back into the kiss with renewed passion, pulling them both back into the grass. 

\----

The night passed by agonizingly slow for Ezra as he sat by Zeb’s bed, restless, unable to sleep. He should have woken up by now, why was he still sleeping? His wounds had healed, he should be well on the road to recovery and waking up so they could get off this planet before the Empire tracked them down. Yet he stubbornly refused to wake up. A part of him was starting to wonder if he would wake up.

“Still asleep?” Kanan softly asked as he joined Ezra.

“What if he never wakes up?” Ezra asked.

“Hey, don’t think like that,” Kanan firmly said. “He will wake up and he will be okay.”

“Zeb wanted to die though,” Ezra whispered. “I felt it. He didn’t care about trying to fight to keep living anymore. He just wanted it all to be over…” Kanan didn’t respond at first, the room falling into a painful silence. Just as Ezra started to think Kanan wouldn’t answer, he slowly said. 

“He was in unimaginable pain in that moment. He thought he was going to be reunited with someone extremely important that he thought had died only to discover they had died waiting to be rescued. Not only is he now dealing with the grief of them dying for the second time, he is also probably dealing with a great deal of self-hatred for not realizing he was alive. He probably believes he deserved to die instead of him.”

“But that’s ridiculous! How could he have known this Alex person was alive?”

“Survivors guilt…it’s difficult to work through,” Kanan sighed. “There’s no one who was their to help remind you that their wasn’t really anything that could have been done….it’s just you battling all of these demons that are telling you its your fault…that it should have been you….”

“…I can’t imagine how that must feel,” Ezra mumbled. 

“It’s painful…. isolating,” Kanan whispered. “Which is why now more then ever he needs us, his family, to be there for him.

“How can we be if he won’t wake up?” Ezra softly asked. 

“They say people who are sleeping can hear their loved ones,” Kanan said. “Maybe Zeb can hear us.”

“Zeb….if you can hear us, you need to wake up soon before I go stir crazy,” Ezra said. “He better know we are not leaving without him, no matter what.”  
\----

They hadn’t wasted a moment in reconnecting with each other in every sense possible, pouring every ounce of love they had for each other in a moment of desperation. They had all of eternity to learn each other once more, but neither could wait a moment longer. It was the most wonderful night he had the pleasure of having in years. 

Time ceased to exist as they lay in the grass, side by side, staring up at the setting sun. It was everything they deserved to have when alive but never could have. Peace. No fears. No worries. No pain. Just endless joy and freedom. A dark thought though cut through the thick yet pleasant fog; why was no one else here? At first he simply thought everyone was just giving himself and Alex a chance to properly be reunited in private, but as the hours passed and still no one else came to greet him, he was starting to get concerned. 

“What’s wrong love?” Alex softly said, tenderly cupping his cheek, stroking it with his thumb.

“Where is everyone?” Zeb asked, “I thought….I was certain everyone would want to see me….” Alex hesitated for a moment, looking conflicted. “…what?”

“…no one can visit you yet my love because…you have not died yet.”

“What do you mean?” Zeb asked, confused. “I-I’m here with you right now-“

“You soul has left the land of the living but your body still lives,” Alex explained. “It desperately clings onto life even as your soul is preparing to leave. You cannot pass on truly until your body dies.”

“…so….if my body heals, I may be forced to go back?” Zeb worriedly asked. 

“If your own will is not stronger then your body’s desire to live, yes.” Alex said. 

“My will?” Zeb asked. 

“Look up into the sky,” Alex whispered. “What do you see?”

“…” Zeb slowly looked up in confusing and said, “the sky….?”

“Do you see a light in the sky where the sun should be, that burns even brighter. It calls your name, whispering peace and freedom?”

“I-I don’t see anything….” Zeb said. “Not even the sun.”

“Your body is much stronger than I realized,” Alex whispered. 

“I don’t want to survive, I want to stay here with you,” Zeb whispered. 

“I want you to stay with me too,” Alex whispered. “There is a way to ensure you don’t ever wake up.”

“What?” Zeb eagerly asked. 

“If we can find a way to help you break through the barrier that surrounds this place your soul could move on and your body would die.”

“Any ideas how to do that?”

“Not really,” Alex honestly said.

“I’ll break through,” Zeb said, punching the invisible barrier, only for his arm to get violently thrown back, causing Zeb to stumble backwards from the force. With a roar, Zeb threw himself with his full body at the barrier, only to get thrown back.

“Zeb!” Alex cried, racing to his side. “Are you alright?”

“Fine, I’ll be better once this stupid barrier is gone,” Zeb growled, scrambling to his feet, charging at the barrier again, smashing his fists against it as he dug his feet into the ground, trying to force his way through. “Let. Me. Out!” Zeb roared, punching the way between each word. 

“Zeb stop!” Alex snapped. “This is not working.”

“I don’t want to live anymore!” Zeb cried. “Why can’t I just die in piece?”

“You will in time,” Alex soothingly said. “The land of the living will beckon you, beg you to return with promises of hope and a future. Do not listen to it. It lies.”

“I-“ Zeb froze, for just a moment, Alex was gone, a shadowy figure with piercing red eyes stood in his place. With a blink Alex was standing their again and Zeb was certain it was his imagination. 

“Just stay with me love,” Alex whispered. 

“Always,” Zeb declared. He would never leave Alex’s side again. No matter what.


	8. The Call

Zeb had expected his body to give in and die fairly quickly, but his body was apparently stubbornly clinging onto life. His body may be stubborn, but he was far more stubborn and much stronger than his physical body was. He refused to live. He would finally stay with Alex forever, and no one would tear them apart. 

“Do you think….everyone will be happy to see me?” Zeb softly asked. 

“How could they not?” Alex asked. 

“I lived when they died,” Zeb mumbled. “I should have died with you and everyone else.”

“You’re here now, that’s all that matters,” Alex gently said. 

“How has everyone been doing?” Zeb asked. 

“You can ask them when you see them,” Alex said. “I don’t want to take anything away from them.”

“I just….I want to know my parents still love me….”

“Once they see you did everything you could to get back to them again it will all be alright.” Alex assured. 

“Wait-so they are angry?” Zeb cried, heart hammering in his chest.

“Zeb, I never said tha-“

“But you didn’t say they don’t!” 

“Zeb, breathe love,” Alex said. 

“Bu-“

“Zeb!” An unfamiliar voice called out. 

“Did you-“

“Ignore her!” Alex cried. “She’s a demon, she wants to keep us apart!”

“Zeb! Zeb darling get away from him!” The woman’s voice cried. Her voice seemed….familiar. Like he heard it once in a dream. 

“Zeb don’t listen to her!” Alex cried. 

“But…I think I know her….” Zeb whispered, standing up and slowly walking up to the edge of the invisible barrier. 

“That’s what she wants you to think!” Alex cried. “You can’t know her you’ve never met her!”

“I really think I do know her…..” Zeb said. 

“Zeb!” The voice called. “Zeb! You need to leave this place!”

“Why?” Zeb asked, peering into the woods as a figure that was approaching the barrier. 

“You will die if you don’t!”

“I want to die,” Zeb said. “I’m tired of fighting and living alone! I want to be with my husband and family!”

“That is not your husband,” The woman said as she reached the edge of the clearing, earning an enraged growl from Zeb. 

“I don’t know who you are lady but you are walking on thin ice.” Zeb snapped. “Who are you to accuse-“

“Don’t you recognize me?” She softly asked. 

“Zeb don-“ Alex said, grabbing Zeb’s hand to pull him away. But Zeb couldn’t tear his gaze away from the woman who reminded him so much of his aunt….

“Mom?” Zeb whispered, eyes wide as realization hit him. His mother was here. 

“It’s so good to finally see you again,” She whispered. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“M-mom,” Zeb whispered, choking on a sob as he threw his arms around her, clinging onto her as Alex frantically tried to yank him away.

“Zeb don’t listen to her!” Alex cried. 

“Alex, she’s my mother-“

“No she’s not! No one can get in here!” Alex snapped. 

“But…. you’re here….” Zeb said, confused. “If no one can be here then….you shouldn’t be here….” Nothing was making sense anymore. Was Alex not really Alex? Was this really his mom? Was any of this real? Was he even dying? Or was this just a dream he hadn’t woken up from?

“Zeb sweetie listen to me, you need to wake up,” His mother frantically said. “Death is not the answer-“

“I want to be with you and dad and Alex!” Zeb cried. “I want us to be together!”

“This is not the way!” His mother said. “You have a long life to live! A new family who loves you and needs you as you need them.”

“What about us?” Alex demanded. “Don’t you love me Zeb?”

“Of course I do-“

“If he loved you, he would want you to live a long and happy life!” His mother cried. 

“I just want us to be together-“ Alex began, but his mother was not hearing it,

“The real Alex would want the love of his life to be happy.”

“I am the real Alex!” Alex cried. 

“No one is buying your tricks demon.”

“Demon?” Zeb cried. “He’s not a demon!”

“Zeb, open your eyes! Your Alex loves you!” His mother cried, “He wants you to live and be happy!”

“And where is this mysterious ‘real’ Alex?” Alex asked, throwing his hands in the air as he slowly turned, gesturing to the empty plain around them. “He’s not here because I am the real Alex!”

“No!” Zeb’s mother firmly said. “He’s not here because he cannot be here.”

“That doesn’t even make sense!” Alex cried. “Zeb do you hear this crap-“

“Both of you stop!” Zeb cried, mind reeling as he looked between them. He wanted to believe the man before him was his Alex, his sweet wonderful loving Alex, but…a part of him wondered why he wanted him to die now when before he begged for him to live. 

“Zeb love-“

“I need to think!”

“What is their to think about? I want us to be together-“

“You want me to die though!” Zeb said. 

“I thought you wanted to die,” Alex asked. “Don’t you love me? Don’t you want to be with me?”

“Of course I-“

“If you loved him, you would want him to live a long and happy life!” Zeb’s mother cried. “You would be fighting for him to get to live the life that was taken from you.”

“Not everyone is the same,” Alex growled. 

“No,” She agreed, “But there are some things all living beings have in common.”

Zeb didn’t know what to think, on the one hand, this was his Alex, his husband, his best friend, the man he’d known for practically his entire life. He was his everything and a stranger was telling him his Alex…wasn’t really his Alex. But the stranger was his mother and he could not ignore the nagging in the back of his mind that all of this just felt wrong. The Alex he was with….was not the Alex he fell in love with. He felt…different. Harder, darker, angrier. At first it was easy to just tell himself dying and time changed him, but this was more then that. More like someone trying to play a part but not fully knowing the role they where trying to play. 

“Zeb you need to go back to your family,” His mother whispered. “They need you.” 

“But my family is here!” Zeb said. “You, dad, Alex-“

“We’re not your only family,” His mother said. “You new family, they are waiting for you to wake up and come home. They all love and miss you.” 

“How do you know?” Zeb asked. 

“It’s not hard to see how much you all love each other,” His mother said. “I was so afraid for you when Lasan fell….but then you where found and they pulled you from the darkness, gave you a reason to keep fighting.”

“I wanted to make the Empire pay.” Zeb growled. 

“At first, I think so but…you and I both know somethings changed,” His mother said. “There is something so much more now. A desire to live and experience the galaxy with these people who have become your family.” 

“They’re not my family,” Zeb said. 

“Do you really think that?” His mother asked. Zeb wanted to say yes, they where not his family. But then he couldn’t help but think of the time spent with them. Cooking and eating meals together, Sabine excitedly showing him her latest piece of art. Him, Sabine and Chopper heckling Ezra as he was trying to practice Jedi stuff, he and Ezra plotting revenge against chopper for his latest prank-

“He doesn’t need anyone but me!” Alex declared. 

“What about my parents or our friends?” Zeb asked, horrified Alex would say something like that.

“That’s not what I-“

“Isn’t it though?” Zeb asked. “You….you want me to die….but…just for you.”

“I love you.”

_Zeb…. _A voice echoed through the meadow _Zeb come home. _____

_____ _

“What was that…?” Zeb asked, looking around for the source. The voice sounded so familiar-

_____ _

_Zeb please. _The voice continued. _Kanan.___

________ _ _ _ _

“Wait…Kanan?” Zeb asked, looking up in confusion. 

________ _ _ _ _

“Your family is calling,” His mother gently said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Go back to them.”

________ _ _ _ _

“But I-I want to spend more time with you- I-I want to see dad again-“

________ _ _ _ _

“Zeb sweetie, you can’t see your dad….not right now.” His mother said as everything around them started to wither and die, the sky darkening as a powerful wind blew around them, dark clouds forming above them. 

________ _ _ _ _

“Why?” Zeb cried. As the massive tree’s started to collapse around them. 

________ _ _ _ _

“He’s not here!” His mother cried. “Alex is not here! They never where!”

________ _ _ _ _

“W-what are you talking about?” Zeb cried as a tree crushed his childhood home. “No!”

________ _ _ _ _

“This place isn’t real,” His mother said. “You need to wake up!” 

________ _ _ _ _

_Zeb….you’re fading away….come back to us….. ___

________ _ _ _ _

__Another tree tipped over, hitting the ground between them with such force that the ground beneath their feet began to crack and crumble._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“No, not again!” Why was his home being destroyed again? Suddenly the ground beneath him gave out and he was falling through the immense darkness, Kanan’s voice ringing through his mind as his eyes flew open and he found himself lying in a bed, the Ghost Crew all standing around him, relief in their eyes, shattering Zeb’s heart. No, he was alive._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Zeb! You’re okay!” Hera exclaimed, oblivious to his agony._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“No!” Zeb cried, desperately sitting up, breathing heavily._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Hey Zeb, you’re okay, you’re safe-“_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Why couldn’t you leave me?” Zeb cried._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“You would have died if they left you-“ Sabine said._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Maybe I wanted to die!” Zeb cried._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“You wanted to-“_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Yes!” Zeb roared. “I have nothing left! It’s all gone! Destroyed by the Empire!”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“But….you have us,” Ezra said._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“I know you’ve lost so much-“_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“You don’t know anything!” Zen snapped._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Then help us understand,” Kanan said. “We want to be here for you, but we can’t do that if we don’t understand.”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“How could you possibly understand losing everyone you ever loved!” Zeb roared, freezing when who he was saying this to finally registered in his mind. He expected Kanan to be furious, to yell and scream at him, but he did none of that. Instead he laid a gently hand on his shoulder and squeezed it whispering,_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“I do understand what you’re feeling. I may not have gone through all the same things as you, but…I know what its like to live when everyone you loved died right in front of you….” Kanan trailed off, a distant look in his eyes. “It stays with you…. haunts you…makes you wonder why me?”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“…I don’t deserve to be alive,” Zeb whispered._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“What happened on Lasan was not your fault,” Hera firmly said._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“It was my job to protect my people,” Zeb said. “And I failed.”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“What do you mean your job?”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“…I…Alex….he…I wasn’t….completely honest with you….” Zeb slowly said._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“He wasn’t royalty was he?” Sabine asked._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“That was true,” Zeb said. “But…what I didn’t tell you was that…he…he was also my husband.”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Husband…” Hera whispered, eyes widening as realization hit her. “So…you…”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“I was Lasan’s king,” Zeb said. “Don’t you see? I had no right to live when none of my people lived!”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“That’s not true,” Kanan firmly said. “You living meant a piece of Lasan survived. Against all odds, Lasan lives with you. Every day you live is another day Lasan has not been truly destroyed. Your people would be proud to see you survived and that you continue to survive against all odds.”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“You don’t know that,” Zeb mumbled, looking away from them._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“Your people would have fought until their dying breath to keep any one of their people alive,” Kanan said. “I only met Master Tapal a few times, but despite everything, deep down, I think his first loyalty was to Lasan….I remember him telling the younglings about the brave kings fighting to keep Lasan’s independence despite pressure from everyone to join the Republic…about how he wouldn’t have hesitated to sacrifice himself for them.”_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“H-he said that?” Zeb whispered. Kanan nodded and said,_ _

________ _ _ _ _

__“I can’t know for certain what your people thought, but I do firmly believe that they are happy knowing you are alive despite everything.” Zeb couldn’t formulate a response, choking on a weak sob as he completely broke down in front of them. Despite lying to them, deceiving them, putting them at risk by dragging them on a suicide mission, they where trying to comfort him. Comforting arms wrapped around him and held him close, rubbing soothing circles on his back and arms saying comforting words to him. In that moment, Zeb started to realize that his crew, his family, loved him. Despite everything they loved him._ _

________ _ _ _ _

__He didn’t deserve their love, yet they did and a small part of him couldn’t help but hope that maybe someday he could feel like he deserved it._ _

________ _ _ _ _


End file.
